In every language idiomatic phrases abound, which do not translate word for word into another person's language. If you say to a foreigner "What's up?" They will look up, not realizing you are asking them how they are. While living abroad, I at least make the attempt to speak to the Natives, but it doesn't always work out the way I would like. I have made a few interesting mistakes with my French over the last year and half and I thought I would take you on a stroll down my memory lane in order to learn from my mistakes.One evening after arriving here I was told that I had a lot of hair on the back of my shirt. I tried to respond with a little humor, but it didn't quite work. What I said was, "Je suis une chienne." What I meant was, "I am a dog." What I really said was, "I am a bitch." So, when I was told about my mistake I changed it to "D'accord, je suis une chatte." What I meant was, "Ok then, I am a cat." What I really said was, "OK, I am a pussy," (and not the feline kind...double oops!)
Down the road, my French began to improve, but only slowly. I tried telling someone that I was joking by saying "J'éte blague." That didn't work at all except for the fact that I got a few howls for weeks on that one. It doesn't really mean anything, but as I learned it is certainly not proper French. Even though blague means joke, I should have said "Je plaisantais." Voila, now I know.
In French they say, I "have" cold instead of I "am" cold. Unfortunately, I forgot that little fact once and in doing so I inadvertantly said I was frigid. I learned then too that if I had said I "am" hot as opposed to I "have" heat then I would have been telling the person that I was hot to trot down the road of love (or at least lust).
Then there was Easter. Here in France instead of the Bunny, they have an Easter Bell. When I told two ten-year-olds that the Bell hid some candy for them they matter-of-factly replied that they no longer believed in the Bell and refused to look for the candy. When I told them I was the Bell (all in French remember, which by the way is "je suis le cloche") I was told that I had just informed the children that I am stupid. Ah well, c'est la vie. At least the kids started looking for the candy.
In the memoir Almost French, by Sarah Turnbull, she shared how when she started learning French she asked her man if he wanted "a" pipe instead of "his" pipe. In doing so, she had asked if he wanted a blow job...I failed to mention that she asked him this at a dinner party they were hosting with his friends. Hey, expat sister, I feel your pain.
So, here is the rule of thumb, just don't take yourself too seriously when you make a mistake. At least you will learn not to repeat it again and in the meantime you can have a good laugh.
Thanks for reading and happy talking!
